Infantilization
Buckle up, y’all because today’s topic is so important to me that I actually took the time to write an outline for this post because I did not want to forget anything.
Today’s topic is of course infantilization. This is one that has been on my mind a lot recently, what with Millennials constantly getting picked on for never growing up.
As a Gen Zer, I agree that it is scary to see how many millennials act like children and teenagers, even though many Millennials are well into their 40s.
However, I also know that Gen Z is already facing the same problem: the inability to grow up. I have seen time and time again how Gen Z is treated by older generations. We are still just kids to them, likely because we literally cannot afford to hit the same life milestones as previous generations did when they were our age.
This article talks about which life milestones go into making Gen Z truly feel like adults. Marriage, buying a home, and starting a family are all put on pause until we can achieve financial independence, preferably through a steady job that can help us maintain our financial independence.
As a reaction to the pressure to achieve all of these things in so little time, many turn to nostalgia for their childhoods as a result.
I have talked a lot about nostalgia on this blog–I even wrote a 25 page essay about for school once. I still believe that overall, nostalgia is a good thing.
It is not harmful to look back at your past and realize how good you had it. However, completely reverting back to childhood to the point where the distinction between childhood and adulthood is blurred is bad not only for you, but for those around you. Emotional immaturity is real–please do not put your loved ones through that.
Nostalgia is a tool in which we infantilize ourselves if we are not careful.
For Millennials, this comes across as “cringe” and looks like Millennials trying to relive the glory days when they were young and cool. But their glory days are over, so it’s just really uncomfortable for everyone involved.
Yet, there are plenty of social media trends that are followed by many different age groups. “I’m just a girl” is a few years old at this point, and I’m not really on social media so I don’t know if it’s still a popular trend. But, I do know that Millennials and Gen Z alike participated in that trend.
Also, can I just say that No Doubt’s Just a Girl has the opposite meaning of what the trend portrays? Here is an article that talks about that.
Infantilization is pretty well ingrained into our culture, especially on social media. Infanitlization was ingrained into my personal life long before I was even on social media.
I remember feeling like I was stuck being a little kid forever. It seemed like no matter how hard I worked, how well I did in school, or how many chores I picked up at home, my family was always going to view me as “the baby.”
I am the youngest of my siblings, but by the time I was 16, I was pretty annoyed when my family would act like I didn’t know how to do anything for myself. I convinced myself that things would change once I turned 18 since I would technically be an adult.
Things did not change, and this is the point when I realized it is because I’m the youngest. Subconsciously, my family was not comprehending that I turned 18 and was an adult and had been perfectly capable long before that.
At the same time, I remember being scared. I did not feel prepared enough to be an adult. I had no steady income, no credit, no IRA, and no boyfriend. I had no hope of hitting any of those classic adult milestones. That, of course, changed in due time.
When I got overwhelmed with all of the responsibilities hitting me at once, I turned to creative activities: writing poetry, drawing in my notebook, and (less creative but still fun) watching my favorite shows that I loved as a kid and still love to this day, like Gravity Falls, Total Drama Island, and That 70s Show.
Infantilization is also going to happen to Gen Alpha if we don’t do something about it. At the very least, we need to recognize that mega corporations, you know, the powerful people, control the narrative to reinforce the idea that “adulting is hard” to make sure we keep buying stuff.
As I mentioned in my article “The Treat Yo Self Mindset,” you do not need a sugary iced coffee after you spent all day “adulting,” i.e. going to work. Everyone has to work to earn money except the ultra rich who are born into it. You are not special for going to work. Get over yourself and stop giving all of your hard-earned money to the man.
I know that’s a hard truth to take at this point, but I write all of this out of concern for Millennials, fellow Gen Zers, and Gen Alpha.
I would also like to point out that Infantilization is not just something happening generationally. Women have been infantalized since the beginning of time itself, it happens on social media all the time.
I have seen so many women on social media talk about how their s/o gives them “princess treatment” and how men who don’t provide for their s/o are worthless–the situation is more complex than that. A true companionship is one where two people can depend on each other, not one person doing all of the hard work and the other being “just a girl.”
Infantilization is also prevalent within the almight beauty standard. I will remind you that the current standard of beauty for women is as follows:
- Small pretty much everywhere - waist, neck, arms, legs, and delicate hands and feet
- Hair on only the head and shaved or waxed off everywhere else - legs, armpits, face, privates
- No wrinkles or blemishes
- No stretch marks or cellulite
- Let me know in the comment section if I missed any, but I think that’s the jist
Ideally, all of the above listed traits are natural and not achieved through makeup tricks or plastic surgery, but whatever it takes to meet the standard at the end of the day. Just don’t expect anyone to cheer you on if you do use makeup or get plastic surgery (but please don’t I have seen the horror stories of plastic surgery and trust me you are much more beautiful without it).
And who has all of the above listed traits in common? Children, not fully grown women. Yet fully grown women are expected to physically infantilize themselves to meet these standards.
The good news is that the beauty standard is only the way it is because we agree with it, whether we want to admit it or not. While disagreeing with it is easier said than done, (again, ingrained in our culture) there are already facets of the internet that celebrate the beauty of people who do not have the above listed traits.
I hope reading this brought you some awareness of this widespread issue. It is important to talk about because when we self-infantilize, that makes it easier for us to be taken advantage of. We obviously want to avoid that when we can help it.
We also run the risk of keep ourselves submissive and ignorant to other problems facing our world when we self-infantilize. Yes, some of the world’s problems seem unfixable and incite learned helplessness within us, but there is always a way to make things better. Nobody needs to do this alone.
Escape and ignore is not the answer. Confront and overcome is the answer, and this will help you in the long run in your problem solving and critical thinking.
Don’t lose hope on me, dear reader.
P.S. I was already planning to write this article, but I drew some inspiration from this YouTube video by imuRgency, and I really like what this creator has to say. It is definitely worth a watch. Thank you!